I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
