we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
