have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
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