The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Randomize
