Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
