All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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