your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
