so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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