The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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