Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
