drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
