Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Randomize
