Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
it's like iHOP with fire
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
