I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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