So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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