Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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