I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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