I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize