Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
i drank out of a bidet.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?