worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
