Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
