Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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