Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
We need to get me chipped asap
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
