Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You pole danced in your parka.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
