i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
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He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
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He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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