ADVERTISEMENT

• (231): View more from Michigan

  Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub.  I was in it.

  Fav 29 743 1927

  share tweet
  

• (913): View more from Kansas

  I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.

  Fav 13 1740 1323

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.

  Fav 114 9061 1573

  share tweet
  

• (510): View more from California

  I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.

  Fav 10 6009 964

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie

  Fav 3 2187 1662

  share tweet
  

• (501): View more from Arkansas

  My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?

  Fav 10 1125 3323

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (563): View more from Iowa

  I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.

  Fav 10 5728 1197

  share tweet
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.

  Fav 2 1011 692

  share tweet
  

• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?

  Fav 9 636 1716

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO

  Fav 5 1019 488

  share tweet
  

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers

  Fav 2 928 551

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (651): View more from Minnesota

  He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops

  Fav 0 804 378

  share tweet
  

• (705): View more from Ontario

  The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.

  Fav 0 721 301

  share tweet
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....

  Fav 2 178 336

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (905): View more from Ontario

  She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.

  Fav 1 102 236

  share tweet
  

Randomize