Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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