Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize