That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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