just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
