I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
