D3 body, D1 cock
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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