my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize