Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
