Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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