I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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