I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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