Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Randomize