Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
