I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
