yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
