dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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