I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
