it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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