Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
