On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
my sisters under your porch take her home
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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