So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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