i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
