the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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