His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I want to make a zoo with you.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
